“The biggest difference between money and time is that you always know how much money you have, but you never know how much time you have.” Unknown
My high school teacher, Mr. Thompson, asked this question of every graduating class he taught. All the kids in my class he queried before me answered money, giving a variety of reasons. I answered time. I reasoned that this was the end of our childhood. The last time I would see a lot of these classmates. We were expected to go off to university or get a job and begin to wear the cloak of adulthood. The teacher stated that I was a rarity. People always answered money.
It turns out this has been proven. Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania and UCLA found that a majority of people studied, sixty-four percent, in fact, rated money as more valuable than time. Money is a funny thing: we all want it, we all need it, and we spend most of our good years chasing it. For some, it is a god that they would step over their own mother to get. For others, it is just a necessary evil.
Perhaps it is the way television and the media glamorize wealth and fill our heads full of wants. Maybe it is that money is tangible and time isn’t. At times it flies and others drags on. When you are young, it feels like you have all the time in the world. You do until you don’t. Watch a person going through a midlife crisis and you see the panic... ‘Why didn’t I do these things when I had the chance?’
In your relationship, there are going to be many big and small ways in which you choose time versus money. Job opportunities that mean travel. Spending money on things you don’t need, but want. As a couple, you are going to have to find a balance between obtaining money to survive and carving out time to keep your love for each other alive.
If you are both on the same page in what you value most, you may very well have harmony in this regard. If you are someone who values time, living with someone who values money and status, you may find yourself alone as they work long hours to get ahead.
It is easy to get caught up in the hamster wheel of going to work, coming home tired, grumbling through making supper, and then doing it all again the next day. We get behind at work and put in overtime. Meanwhile, we are not nurturing the bonds with those we love. If you make the choice of money over time, it will impact all your relationships.
Sometimes it is when a crisis rocks our world that we reevaluate this question. Ask the parent who has lost a young child and they will tell you they would give up every last cent to spend one more day with them. We often do not know the value of what we have until we have lost it.
Men define themselves by their career, so it is not necessarily that they value money more, but it seems to boil down to the same thing. They focus on climbing the corporate ladder, even if that means relationships come secondary.
I know a man that spent his life working hard, focused on career over family. He even stated he knew he was not much of a father and a grandfather but didn’t care. Guess what? He’s old now and laments that these same children and grandchildren do not visit him. In the moment his work was his world, but remember at some point, we retire...
“Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them – work, family, health, friends and spirit – and you're keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life." Bryan Dyson
We seem to forget that time is finite. We only have so many years in this life. Once spent you can never get them back. On your deathbed will you regret that you did not spend more time at the office? Probably not. The above mentioned researchers found those that valued time led happier lives.
Make each minute count.
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